Hi again. Don’t worry this isn’t a sad, mental health update. Just a life update. I’m moving into my new flat tomorrow. I completed on it at the end of September and have been redecorating with my dad and a few friends since. I honestly cannot wait to move in and start this new chapter. I’ve been so excited. It’s been expensive and stressful at times don’t get me wrong. But there have been so many times I have stood in the flat just staring at the walls thinking “this is all mine. I have worked so hard for this and it is all mine. And I did it all by myself.”
Obviously dad has helped with the renovations but in terms of finances I did it all by myself. It’s the best feeling of accomplishment. Especially after you’ve been told you would never be able to buy your own property by yourself. Well look at me now.
In the past few updates I’m aware I’ve been reflecting a lot and forgotten to look into the future. Yes the grey cloud called cancer looms over me, but like all clouds it gets bigger and smaller. Sometimes it rains and thunders down on you but after that there are sunny skies and rainbows. This is when I take advantage of life and really try to progress. I try to be happy. I try to do things I enjoy. The cloud will always come back but you never have two clouds the same. Some days they come back bigger and angrier. Some days they come back and might even pass without pouring down on you. I’m not a professional. I cant truly predict the weather. But I promise to give myself as much self love, especially when the cloud is looming over me.
We are not robots, we cannot just soldier on. And of course we can’t just sit and relax all day every day. Balance is key. I want to be able to work and live at 100 miles per hour. This is when I am at my happiest. But it does take its toll. So I’ve learnt that sometimes I need to slow down. Stop. Breathe. And ease myself back into it. It’s okay to get angry. It’s okay to be upset. It’s okay as long as you get back up on your feet and go at it again.
Chapter 24. Living 25/8